Category — Mothering

Ever have one of those mornings when you decided to let the kiddos veg in front of the television? It can be so alluring, the little bit of peace…the kids seem so content.

But then when it comes time to turn it off, instead of the sweet, grateful little cherubs you were expecting, you find them to be discontent and a little grumpy? Though it doesn’t happen here every time, it seems to happen quite often.

I admit, I’ve been letting the boys have too much screen time lately, and I’ve been reaping the consequences…creativity replaced with boredom, and giggles replaced with whining. I felt like we needed a little break from TV and video games.

During the week we don’t do much, but on the Saturdays that Dustin works I often let them watch TV and play video games all morning. This weekend I decided to try something. Just don’t turn it on.

Why not give them a chance to play on their own for a while…to come up with something to do? We could save screen time for a little later in the afternoon. But, you know what? It lasted all day.

The boys built together with wooden blocks. They made pirate ships with the couches. They drew treasure maps. They fought (and fought, and fought) and worked things out.

A church that accepts both people and cars

Corban built the SUV and trailer that he had been saving the noodle box for. (Didn’t get a picture of that yet)

And they made the best marble run yet!

Amazingly, I got more accomplished too.

There was a lot more energy and laughter, and a greater feeling of peace at home.

So, this morning when Jackson and I were waiting for H and P to arrive, instead of turning on Dinosaur Train we got out the “narbles” again. I think this is something we could continue.

Do you ever take a break from screen time?

image by melanieburger

I had a revelation this morning.

One of my biggest struggles, since my oldest child gave up his morning nap, has been finding time for my morning “quiet time”. I’ve tried getting up extra early to spend time in quiet meditation, reading, and prayer, but with a baby who still wakes up a couple times a night, that hasn’t worked. I need my sleep. But I also need this time.

This morning I decided to take my coffee to a chair in the living room and sit for a while. I took out a simple devotional book and my Bible, and I read and prayed a little while Jackson and P played. Though I ended up reading sentences in between acting as a pit stop to two little “dinosaur cars” who were running around the couch, I still found the connection I needed.

Maybe I don’t need to save this time for when everyone is asleep. I can read while nursing a baby or watching little ones play. I can remember and meditate on a verse throughout the day. I can occasionally take the time to stop, breathe, and pray.

In this season of life when I’m “on call” 24/7, I might just need to take multitasking to my spiritual life as well.

And maybe my little ones will see their Mama taking this time out, notice the calm that follows, and remember it.

How does a nickname begin?

First it was Lillian

Then Lily

Then Lily-bug

And now she’s just our little Bug

And a cute one, too.

I admit that I’ve been wrestling with whether to continue blogging. The exhaustion of pregnancy followed by the needs of a newborn have made it difficult to post regularly. And I’ve struggled with my blog not quite being what I want it to be. I’m a perfectionist, and technology and I are not good friends. I was feeling pretty down about it and was ready to give it up.

But then I remembered that it’s February…the month when the dreariness of winter takes its toll on my spirits, and I start feeling like I have no friends, every hair day is bad, nothing fits right, I’m failing my husband and children…you get the picture.

So, with that perspective in mind, I’ve decided to give it one more try. Though I don’t have amazing things to share, I do enjoy the writing. Though I have mostly family and old friends as readers, I still love keeping them updated on our lives. And I love reading your blogs, sharing ideas, and meeting new people through the blogging community.

I’ve made a decision to focus a little more on the simple joys that get me through the dreary days. I hope that by sharing them I can create in myself the habit of a more thankful heart, and I also hope to hear about your joys as well.

So, here’s my first one:

Walking in to check on Lily, and being greeted by the calm, sweet smile of a well-rested baby. My sleep-sensitive baby is finally starting to fall into a good schedule, which has added much more peace and calm to my day. (And that curl at the top of her head…oh, so precious!)

What simple joys lift your spirits during a dreary day?

A little cuddling…

A little kissing…

A little sleeping…(very little)

A little celebrating…

A little crying…

A little multitasking…

A little playing…

Lots of smiles!

What have you been up to?

Every new baby is an adjustment, and this one is no exception. It takes time to learn how to “read” your baby’s cues, doesn’t it?

We’ve had a few fussy days recently, exhausting days that can leave you feeling completely overwhelmed. As I held and rocked Lily in the evenings and she continued to stiffen her little body and scream, the dreaded word was in my mind… was she developing colic?

We’ve struggled through a fussy newborn stage before. When my firstborn was this age, he slept so little that I read every book on sleep that I could get my hands on. Though it seemed that what these authors did best was contradict each other, I did learn some important lessons on sleep: I learned that your baby tends to be happier and more content if she is well-rested, and that timing is everything. But even though I new this, it still took me some time to realize that my baby girl was not hungry or gassy, but just overtired.

One morning after Lily awoke to eat, I noticed that she started yawning and dozing off right after I fed her. So I decided to try rocking her back to sleep, rather than changing her and playing with her like I usually did. And it worked! I stayed on top of her sleepy times as much as possible that day, and as she became more rested, she became more and more content. She was actually letting me put her down to sleep!

So now we’ve had some quieter and happier evenings around here. Though it’s impossible to be completely on top of her nap schedule, especially with two other children in the house, at least I know now what to expect. If we miss a “sleepy window” when she’s first getting drowsy, she’s going to cry and struggle to fall asleep. But then we can just do our best to help her settle down and try again the next time.

My baby is much less fussy now, and mommy is much more relaxed!

What baby lessons have you learned?

I don’t usually do a whole lot of nesting in the way that some women do, like frantically cleaning the bathroom floor with a toothbrush. But I did find myself completely cleaning out and reorganizing the boys’ room and closet after Jackson accidently dumped the fish bowl. I didn’t get a picture of the incident, but it looked something like this:

from the cover of the book No David

And his face looked something like this:

I was completely exhausted when I finished, but I’m glad I got it done.

It’s been cooler here lately, and the feel of fall has given me more energy to accomplish some of the little projects I’ve been wanting to do. And my mood has picked up as well. I love the fall.

But I’ve mostly been taking extra time to rest and relax. I’ve needed to disengage a little, which is why my posts have been scarce and my blogroll has over 200 unread. I look forward to catching up on everyone’s lives eventually after the baby comes, but for now my usual computer time has been taken with napping, crocheting, or just playing with my boys. I’ll be 38 weeks along on Saturday, which is how far along Jackson was when he was born. I’ll post some pictures soon of some of the things I’ve been making for baby (which is more my kind of nesting).

How have you been enjoying your fall?

image by madalena-pestana

Resisting the urge to turn on the television after putting the kids to bed and waiting for Dustin to get home…

Putting down the novel and letting my mind be still for a while…

Folding laundry without music or TV to entertain my brain…just quiet…

Stopping myself from putting in several hold requests at the library after reading this post and this post (but writing the titles down to read at another time!)

Putting down the baby books and magazines…

Spending more time reflecting, praying, meditating on the Proverbs I’ve been reading instead of complaining about never having the time to do that.

Enjoying the little squirming arms and legs I feel moving inside me, and trying to wrap my mind around the fact that very soon another little life will be part of this family.

Right now my body is tired, and my mind is tired…yet I still find myself filling it with noise. I need the quiet and the stillness.

I crave the wisdom and peace that I know comes not from more reading but through a little more solitude.

These tiny snatches of time are often lost to us. What a pity! They can and should be redeemed. They are times for inner quiet, for reorienting our lives like a compass needle. They are little moments that help us to be genuinely present where we are.

Richard Foster
from Celebration of Discipline

What are ways that you find quiet in the midst of a busy day?

One moment you’re a puppy, the next you’re a “choo-choo”.

You love to mimic the car horns, bird calls, and any other interesting sound you hear.

You love to tell jokes, and they always make me laugh.

You have the sweetest baby laugh, and you use it all day long.

You’re my baby and my big boy all wrapped up in the sweetest, most precious three-year-old package.

Happy Birthday, sweet boy.

Mommy will miss you.